| There is much evidence to support the idea that our | | | | at an inner level. |
| thoughts and words are very powerful and go to | | | | 'Should' is a good one to be aware of, as there is |
| make up our world reality. | | | | usually some feelings of guilt behind it. Do you ever |
| 'With our thoughts we make our world' - Gautama | | | | find yourself saying, 'I should go and do xyz'? At the |
| the Buddha. | | | | back of this is the idea that if I do not I will feel bad. |
| 'Energy follows thought' - Annie Besant - Thought | | | | We also have never, forever and always. These |
| Power: Its Control and Culture (1903/1979). | | | | come under the heading of gross generalizations. The |
| 'We become what we behold' - William Blake. | | | | first thing that can be stated is they are generally |
| 'Man creates his own disharmony'- Hasrat Inyayat | | | | 'never' true all the time. For example; 'She always |
| Khan. | | | | gets that look on her face when I come home late' |
| With the above in mind let us have a closer look at | | | | and 'you never buy me anything nice any more.' |
| some of the words we use and the deeper meaning | | | | These statements are reflecting the perception of |
| of these. | | | | the person generalizing, not the reality of the matter. |
| We might begin with a phrase that is frequently | | | | Again, use awareness with regard to what is going |
| heard when you state something to someone. This | | | | on in any given communication situation. |
| is, 'yes but.' This is their way of negating the opinion | | | | The word 'try' is another interesting little word. You |
| or idea that you have expressed. Listen to yourself | | | | may have seen a demonstration of this when |
| as you speak. Do you use this? It is a communication | | | | someone is asked to try to pick up a pen. You do |
| blocker. The option for acknowledging what the | | | | not 'try' to do something. You either do it or you do |
| other person says AND just stating your own opinion | | | | not. Another example would be if you ask someone |
| is to use 'yes and' instead. This will improve the | | | | to do something for you and they reply that they |
| energy of the communication. Firstly it acknowledges | | | | 'will try' to do whatever it is you have asked. You |
| the persons point of view as valid for them and | | | | can be pretty sure with that sort of comeback your |
| secondly it keeps the flow of the conversation in | | | | request will not be honored. |
| place. | | | | Be aware of what words and phrases you use. You |
| There are empowering and disempowering words | | | | will be surprised and delighted at what a difference |
| that most of us use a lot of the time. For instance | | | | changing your words can have on your |
| 'got to', 'have to' and 'must' usually denote a feeling | | | | communication with others and your life in general. |
| of no choice. Again, listen to your self talk and the | | | | This really can be quite transformational. |
| speech of others to get a sense of what is going on | | | | Go forth and have fun playing with words! |